I am reliably informed that another week has passed and that it is time for another dumpster dive into the week that was weak. Lots of stuff competed for the top spot on the list this time around. Let’s have at it.
- This week Mitt Romney, in the words of Jonathan Kay, “blew the Birther dog whistle.” Here’s Slate’s take on the birther joke. International press caught wind of it, and the Obama campaign, of course, pounced on it like a frolicsome puppy.
- In Texas, a judge recommended preparing for the civil war/UN invasion that would come when Obama was reelected. He should be institutionalized and kept well away from the bench. The UN denied any such plans and twirled its evil mustachio, but we know that the UN troops are actually training down the road in Minneapolis. For the record, however, I would support the invasion and occupation of Lubbock.
- Todd Akin, or as he is known in the House, “The Honorable Mr. Angry Sperm Fighting Secretions Guy,” blamed the liberal media for his plight. The problem is, of course, that the entire Republican party, including some of the insane ones, wanted him to step down.
- What if the town of Eureka were a real place…on the Moon? A breakaway civilization?
- Here’s a ripe little slice of hell: Scientologists for Ron Paul at the RNC.
- Smug conservative is smug. Also, pushes increasingly popular idea that George Soros is funding…everything.
- From my new departmental colleague Michael J. Faris comes a report of the always level-headed Rush Limbaugh blaming Obama for the hurricane bearing down on Tampa.
- CNN: New Swift-Boaty film “silly.”
- God, the IntelHub is such a yawn. But the military does actually have a problem with racism and some of its vets do seem to link up with other racists while in the service. Tim McVeigh comes to mind.
- Pussy Riot was deceived into breaking the law by U.S. NGOs.
- Here’s someone taking a page from Michelle “I’ll Put Anyone At Risk For an Imaginary Point Especially If They Are Swarthy Also I Scare Children” Bachmann’s book. Jonathan Kay, again, also had a take on this.
- Monica Crowley is a moron. This is not an ad hominem. This is a conclusion.
- After the Republican Convention, sheriff outfit owner Joe Arpaio is hosting Britherpalooza.
- Also in the broiling hell hole that is Arizona, employees at a water treatment plant have failed to fluoridate the municipal water for 2 years.
- “Be it here resolved that Ron Paul is basically a dink.”
- Exopolitics.org never fails to deliver the goods: “HAARP-Chemtrails WMD Exposing a Spiritual Mass Mind-control and Planetary Assault“. I wish I got to put such talk titles on my CV.
- A Sovereign Citizen is running for Sheriff in NH, Josh Bunting reports. This is the same guy who is cool with using deadly force to stop abortions. I don’t know if he’s talking about shooting the doctors or the mothers, one of which would be quite ironic.
- “Since the tragic event at Cinema 16 in Aurora, Colorado, I have been working like a woman possessed to document the evidence which connects this tragedy to the London Olympics.”
- I checked. Not a Poe. Planned Parenthood gets kids hooked on sex to sell them abortions. With hilarious party favors. (Warning: this video should not be watched without children present):
- A fun little article about the Satanic Illuminati’s control of the music industry, correctly, I think, going way back to Robert Johnson and even earlier for the roots of the story.
- It’s true. Julian Assange has woven a gigantic conspiracy theory surrounding his rape charge. David Allen Green has done an excellent take-down of the conspiracy theory, which has earned him the twitter-ire of the devout.
- Director Tony Scott faked his own death.
TWIT OF THE WEEK
An embarrassment of riches this week, really.
The Onion @TheOnion
Conspiracy Theorist Convinces Neil Armstrong Moon Landing Was Faked http://onion.com/RNPcUe #InFocus
David Allen Green @DavidAllenGreen
Already woo-woos are disputing both the shadows and flags of Neil Armstrong’s funeral service.
Tom Dullemond @Cacotopos
Today it is every person’s solemn duty to punch a moon-landing-hoax conspiracist. #RIPNeilArmstrong
And then there was this guy:
Murad Merali @OhSweetArabia
400+ died today in Syria but they get NO recognition. A man dies who supposedly went to the moon is everywhere. Our society is diabolical
The response to Mitt’s birther joke was swift on the Internet:
Mitt Romney: “I’m not racist for bringing up Obama’s birth certificate. I’m just PANDERING to racists. Totally different.” — Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat)
Mitt Romney: “No one has ever asked to see my birth certificate. They only do that to demean black people, which I am clearly not.” — Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat)
Frank Conniff (@FrankConniff)
Rush Limbaugh loved Mitt Romney’s birther joke. That’s like John Wayne Gacy raving about one of your clown paintings.
BREAKING: Tampa is reporting a serious shortage of tin foil. #p2 #uppers — Joseph J. Santorsa (@Marnus3)
Oh, what the hell. Let’s just make this the “All Jon Kay, All the Time” edition of the roundup.
“@JosephFarah: County plans no-church zone http://t.co/5deqws64 R we still living in USA?” Ha! this from guy who led Ground 0 mosque freakout — Jonathan Kay (@jonkay)
And that’s all for now. I’m going to go pick deer ticks off myself after my birdwatching romp in the woods this afternoon. Now that I don’t have to wear a “Live Strong” bracelet anymore, perhaps I should consider putting a flea and tick collar around my wrist?