Technically, it will be “These Last Few Weeks and a Bit in Conspiracy,” but who’s keeping score, really?
- Who needs to teleport to get Mars? “Chad Johnson” went there on a rocket ship! Oh, and he has a twitter account.
- Did we go to the moon? Buzz Aldrin’s EKG sure thinks so.
- New Madrid earthquake to be next 9/11? “Whether they claim it is a natural event or blame it on China, Iran or the Tea party movement, it makes no difference. A New World Order is the end game.”
- “Who would believe that in the year 2012 one would have to ask if the U.S. Military would fire on American Citizen’s?” IntelHub would, but they’re nuts.
- Prince Harry is not Prince Charles’ biological son, and I know they’ll both be pleased to hear that.
- Infowars seems to think that you can get AIDS from corn. I think they are using their corn wrong.
- I want to be around when this guy tells a North Korean that Americans live in a Stalinist state, just to hear the slap.
- Was the Presidential Security Detail in Columbia penetrated by an assassin? “Why the hell not?” asks Gordon Duff. Mike Adams, who should know a thing or two about being a whore, comes to a different conclusion. But maybe it was a failed Presidential coup?
- Did Barrack Obama catch gay AIDS during a crack orgy? Well, if he’s dying, at least he hurried up and declared himself dictator while he was still strong enough.
- PRAISE JESUS! A MITT ROMNEY BIRTHER CONSPIRACY THEORY! Oh, man, I need a cigarette after that one.
- A movie that answers Oliver Stone’s pig-idiotic JFK in the works.
- Look out! The earth is cracking up!
- One guy figures it all out. Others who have already figured it all out not impressed.
- Why would people bother smearing Sheriff Outfit Owner Joe Arpaio? He does it to himself. Take for instance the seriousness with which he takes criminal investigations. Oh, I guess Phoenix picks on the laughingstock with a “choose a Joe Arpaio caption contest.”
- Naked lady naked at Denver International Airport, nakedly.
- This show looks interesting. About people preparing for the end of the world.
- Alfred Lambremont Webre of Exopolitics laments that Wikipedia may be taking down the page about him because he is not notable. His take? “My view is that Wikipedia’s action continues to be part of the CIA time travel controlled US Presidency’s retaliation against me for having exposed Soetoro/Obama’s participation in a 1980-83 secret CIA jumproom project.” That’s probably it.
- Andrew Breitbart died of ironic heart failure. Not murder.
- A conspiracy theorist answers the charge that “someone would have talked” about huge conspiracies: “NUH-UH!” says conspiracy theorist.
- Minutemen (vigilante Mexican border patrols–never Canada, odd that) are going to the Tea Party. If the Tea Party doesn’t say, get the hell out, then they are confirming their own stereotype.
- IntelHub has a freakout about “Black Helicopters.” This time, Chicago + NATO meeting = martial law!
- Anders Breivik thinks that there is a racist plot to discredit him, that it’s apparently not the mass murder he’s so happy about.
- Remote Viewers Say Apollo 16 Astronauts Found Alien Ship. But then again, they say lots of things.
- WAKE UP SHEEPLE!
- “Physicist: HAARP Enables Earthquakes, Cyclones, Gravity Cloaks, Time Travel And Light Speed Spacecraft.” Notice they don’t say a “good physicist.”
- Is the NRA’s Wayne LA Pierre a conspiracy theorist? Heck, yeah.
- Hey, Chris French is in The Scotsman! He has a new study out that links conspiracy theories to feelings of lack of control. This makes a lot of sense to me, but I still need to read the study.
- This is the least probable thing that I have read about the moon this week, that a Borg cube inside the moon is making aliens. Make sure that you read the Borg Serenity Prayer in the comments!
- Are the Men in Black grey aliens who are completely incapable of stealth and secrecy?
- Before It’s News contributor speculates about whether or not quantum time pockets could be responsible for EVPs. Also, what the crap is a quantum time pocket? I think that it would go something like this:
It is of course well known that careless talk costs lives, but the full scale of the problem is not always appreciated.
For instance, at the very moment that Arthur said “I seem to be having tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle,” a freak wormhole opened up in the fabric of the space-time continuum and carried his words far far back in time across almost infinite reaches of space to a distant Galaxy where strange and warlike beings were poised on the brink of frightful interstellar battle.
The two opposing leaders were meeting for the last time.
A dreadful silence fell across the conference table as the commander of the Vl’hurgs, resplendent in his black jewelled battle shorts, gazed levelly at the G’Gugvuntt leader squatting opposite him in a cloud of green sweet-smelling steam, and, with a million sleek and horribly beweaponed star cruisers poised to unleash electric death at his single word of command, challenged the vile creature to take back what it had said about his mother.
The creature stirred in his sickly broiling vapour, and at that very moment the words I seem to be having tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle drifted across the conference table.
Unfortunately, in the Vl’hurg tongue this was the most dreadful insult imaginable, and there was nothing for it but to wage terrible war for centuries.
Eventually of course, after their Galaxy had been decimated over a few thousand years, it was realized that the whole thing had been a ghastly mistake, and so the two opposing battle fleets settled their few remaining differences in order to launch a joint attack on our own Galaxy – now positively identified as the source of the offending remark.
For thousands more years the mighty ships tore across the empty wastes of space and finally dived screaming on to the first planet they came across – which happened to be the Earth – where due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was accidentally swallowed by a small dog.
Those who study the complex interplay of cause and effect in the history of the Universe say that this sort of thing is going on all the time, but that we are powerless to prevent it.
“It’s just life,” they say.
- Ah, finally something different from the land of 9/11 Truthers. 9/11 was a false flag event that allowed the literal KGB into the country in the guise of Homeland Security.
- Well, that’s it. NASA is in cahoots with Satan to bring us Project Blue Beam, and IntelHub is reporting on it. In an especially feeble case of the feebles, the author seems to refer to Angels and Demons as if it were actually happening and that workers at CERN spend all day making antimatter and putting it in jars.
- Why is Ireland being militarized?
- Russians think that HAARP might tip earth over.
- The Grey aliens are keeping human souls on their spaceships, saith exopolitics, who saith a lot of things. Hey, this is verified by a hypno-regression therapist, people!
- Stephen Colbert reports on a dating site for apocalypse survivalists.
Twit of the Week:
Paul of Paul and Storm had a good tweet this week:
[P] In honor of today’s anniversary of Project MKULTRA, I’m going to secretly feed my family LSD-laced tacos.
The twerpiest tweet of the week won not only because of the horrific violation of the laws of logic the tweet embodies, but also because the article talks at some length about how Anders Breivik told the court how he did it all alone. TURN ON YOUR THINKER, DUDE!
@ItsDaMedia: Norway Killer Studied Oklahoma Bomber. Which means he was an agent!! PERIOD! No big terror act is done by a lone wolf!
We are speeding into the last weeks of classes right now, and I have a couple of little projects in the works. You will hear of them soon, I am sure.
Muahahaha, as they say.