The hectic pace of a youngish professional on the way to… ever having permanent employment… remains, uh, hectic.
You just try to come up with an opening sentence so devastatingly painful, I dare you.
Anyway, I’ve been remiss in my duties as a crusader for truth (small t), justice, and critical thinking, and as we close in on the election, everyone is clearly getting dumber. I apologize for this and will try to set things right.
- This week Donald Trump made yet more of a fool of himself. I didn’t think it was possible. He offered $5,000,000 to a charity if Obama released his college applications. This is part of the Birther conspiracy theory, that the President’s application materials will reveal something about the President’s citizenship. The theory is that they are “being kept secret,” when in reality FERPA keeps Columbia from releasing them. Some things you can’t buy, Donald, like respectability. For everything else, there’s gobs and gobs of inherited money.
- Mark Dice is unfathomably unpleasant. Here’s his take on the upcoming (and delayed) Cleveland Show episode about the “Rap Illuminati,” and he seems to not understand that the show is basically mocking people like Mark and Vigilant Citizen who fail to perceive that marketing is driving the continued references to the Illuminati in rap and pop culture.
- Occasionally, Mark Dice goes out and lies to people and then mocks them for believing him (because he is just that pleasant). He sent out this tweet: “Hope you are enjoying my retweets of the ZOMBIES who believe the SATIRE about Romney ‘banning tampons.’ #Idiots.” As long as he doesn’t ban douches, Mark, you’ll be just fine.
- Veterans Today‘s Gordon Duff appeared on Coast to Coast AM talking about UFO disclosure.
- In related news, this week I met George Noory:
- Hollywood is going to produce September Morn with Woody Harrison, Martin Sheen and Ed Asner–freaking HOLLYWOOD GOLD! It’s the 9/11 Truther narrative.
- Is organized pedophilia (or “Big Pervert”) behind anti-abortion activism? Almost certainly not. (Unless the Catholic Church counts.)
- The international condemnation of the assassination attempt on Malala Yousafzai has spawned a conspiracy theory that the West took the potshot at her.
- YousafzaiI like the pope because the pope smokes dope. Like Jesus.
- Did anyone see the “suppressed cancer cure” episode of Family Guy last week? I missed it.
- Looks like David Icke’s long-anticipated(?) Wembley Arena event will be streamed online on 27 Oct.
- Skeptoid did an episode on the “made-up history” hypothesis.
- Female contraceptives lead to male homosexuality.
- FEMA has ordered 100,000+ boxcars and shackles. So you know what that means. Any day now. Man, you can find ANYTHING on eBay.
- Hey! A Shakespeare conspiracy play is opening in Columbus, OH. If anyone has any info about this, let me know. I hear it’s purported to be written by two authors from Rockford, both of whom are Michelle Obama. (See how goofy your conspiracy theory would have sounded in the day.) Actually, this one is a Marlovian conspiracy.
- A hopeless little write-up about the business of conspiracy theories.
- Kirk Nimmo breaks devine wind in the direction of a man-made hurricane Sandy conspiracy theory.
- Texas Attorney General threatens to arrest UN elections observers, for some reason.
- An explosion at Camp Minden (Louisiana) leads to a variety of conspiracy theories.
- Why would anyone look to Alex Jones for information about anything?
- Minor actress(?) Tila Taquilla freaks out over the Illuminati.
- According to the Intel Hub, the FBI staged a thwarting bombing of the Fed to scare people. Of course, they then immediately announced the evil scheme so the world…’aaaaaang on….How’s that supposed to work again, guys?
- Asperger’s hacker hacks NASA and says they’ve been covering up alien contact. And we know it’s true because ASPERGER’S PATIENTS CAN’T LIE!!!eleventy!!!emphasis!!! They can, of course, still just be wrong.
- Swede embraces chemtrail weirdness. Also is Miljöpartie member of Parliament.
- When did David Duke start to look like Michael Jackson with a comb-over?
- The first class of the Obamajugend has graduated. Their mothers are very proud of them.
Twit of the Week:
A new player is in town. Here are two tweets in order. I want to know what class this was and where it was at!
Molly Williams (@LookItsMolly) tweeted at 11:08 AM on Thu, Oct 25, 2012:
Professor: “The character says she called 911 instead of saying she called the police. We can assume that this is a reference to 9/11.”
(https://twitter.com/LookItsMolly/status/261499375883276288)Molly Williams (@LookItsMolly) tweeted at 11:08 AM on Thu, Oct 25, 2012:
… and then I realized that literary theorists and conspiracy theorists are uncomfortably similar.
(https://twitter.com/LookItsMolly/status/261499442702741505)
Well played, Molly. Well played. I elaborated on a similar theme back in the day in my NeMLA presentation, “The Topography of Ignorance: Science and Literary Theory,” of which I am quite proud.
The least helpful, least insightful, most pathetic debate commentary came from Mark Dice:
Mark Dice @MarkDice
Both of these men think they are God. #Debates #Illuminati #SatanicScumbags
Just end it, man. You just aren’t cut out for…anything.
That’s all. Last week I was at the Paradigm Symposium on behalf of Skeptical Inquirer, and I will be writing that up over the next week or so. It was a hell of a time. Stay tuned!
RJB