You thought you were safe because nothing happened last week, but THIS week is the one we’ve been waiting for. So grab yer guns and head to the bomb shelters. I’ll come and get you when it’s all over. It’s time for the week in conspiracy:
- Did imaginary nanothermite make 9/11 first responders sick?
- No, it was nuclear weapons, a story that seems to be making the rounds.
- Lovely. The John Birch Society embraces the Tea Party.
- Here’s one from the real news: General orders investigation into psy-ops plying trade on Congress. Oddly, I did not see this in the weirdosphere.
- The KC star’s ombudsdman asks whether it is worth it to address goofy conspiracy theories.
- I…this…guy…I have no idea.
- Have you heard about the TRANSHUMANIST AGENDA!?! Me neither, but apparently we should be scared because Johnny-5 is alive. Oh, this is part 11:
- Wisconson has fewer hate groups, sez SPLC.
- So you know how Charlie Sheen, failure, managed to emphasize his uselessness on Alex Jones’s show? Well, now the certifiable loon (Jones…I know it’s hard to distinguish them when they are piled on so thick) is touring the mainstream media about the interview and pushing his goof. Do they know that he has all the credibility of a…git? I thought the mainstream media was all bad, X-lax.
- My favorite blog entry this week: “Earth to Paulbots: You Are Irrelevant.” (Washington Times)
- This week was the anniversary of the Battle of Los Angeles, when the US Army engaged the alien threat and, according to MJ-12 documents, downed two alien spacecraft. Tim Farley (whatstheharm.net) reminded me of this, and I played the Battle of Los Angeles episode of Skeptoid to my class of ROTC students. When the episode ended, one student asked, “Where do you find this stuff?”
- Leave it to Bill O’Reilly to make me agree with Karl Rove, when the egg-headed prince of fracking darkness appeared on his show to slam the truthers, Paulites, birthers, etc. Damn you, O’Reilly!
- Mega-Jew George Soros is driving unrest in the Arab world. Is it me, or did nobody give a squirt about Soros before Beck started talking about him?
- Seth Mnookin noticed an uptick in the number of tweets about the “flouridation conspiracy,” an evil plot to strengthen you teeth. I know that an initiative in Calgary just went through to block flouridation.
- Obama declares long-awaited national state of emergency because of…Libya? This is, of course, the pretext, sez the conspiracy fringe, of Obama taking away guns and locking babies in concentration camps. I looked for anything like confirmation in the mainstream press. Nothing popped out. I mean, really, nothing.
- The aflockapylpse is spreading to several different species! Is it HAARP? Really probably not!!!! (And I thought I was OCD! This guy takes the taco!)
- The History Channel (oh, if it only were history!) examines the Georgia Guidestones. Hopefully, I’ll be doing something infinitely better on them soon. Stay tuned.
- Can we give Texas back to Mexico? Would they even take it? GOPPers in the failed state muses about Obama’s energy policy: “Maybe it is part of the New World Order to promote chaos and division so that government can be proclaimed as the liberator and to justify the expansion of the federal government much like national healthcare.” Classic conspiracist non-thought.
- Some guy protests…everything: “Who is strong enough to challenge these godless liberal intellectuals in colleges all across America, who claim that capitalism has failed?” NOBODY!!! I AM ALL POWERFUL!!!! I MEAN IF I COULD ONLY GET A JOB!!!!! MUAHAHAHAH!
- I’m including this one because the title was poetry: “Analysis of the Global Insurrection Against Neo-Liberal Economic Domination and the Coming American Rebellion.” Just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?
- “Is World War III already being fought online?” Yeah, if you mean World of Warcraft.
- Bug Girl, the only person who can possibly prevent me from becoming eaten alive by bedbugs, tweeted that Canada’s ex-defense minister believes that the US has UFO technology. Canada, you used to be so level-headed.
- The fapping to disaster-porn continued as Above Top Secret reported that the Christchurch earthquake was predicted at week ahead of time.
- How not to pull off a hoax. 1) Photoshop a famous picture. Enter the NASA/Masonic conspiracy:
- Did you hear? There’s an immunocontraceptive in the flu vaccine! What, are we deer? (You can tell that it’s going to be cool when they start with a quote from Gen. Stubblebine, the guy who tried to walk through a wall in The Men Who Stare at Goats. Really.)
Conspiracy Theory of the Week:
There was only one contender for conspiracy theory of the week. It was Alex Jones’s complete freakout, what quickly became known as the “Justin Beibler [sic] Rant.”
Seriously, how is this guy not in some sort of home?